５ Feelings of Love are Not Small
“H-hey, Koto-chan, where are we going?”
“I don’t know! I started walking on impulse but I can’t find a good spot!”
“Well, it’s only been a week since orientation...”
Neither of us knew the campus that well yet. Ever since Koto-chan had dragged me out of the cafeteria, we’d been circling the school hallways. The students loitering in the halls were starting to give us suspicious looks, like Why are they just wandering around?
“Listen, maybe we should just stop for a second?”
“No! I can’t stop! A light jog is my default setting!”
“Ah...”
I guess since her body was so small, she’d be too slow if she walked at a normal pace.
“Then, can I be the one to stop you?”
“So even a non-deli can ask for permission. Fine, stop me.”
“Right, right.”
I gently shook her hand off my wrist, then slid both my hands under her arms and lifted her up.
Whoosh. Koto-chan’s tiny body rose into the air. She was even lighter than I’d imagined.
“Whoaaa! Tochika-kun, are you secretly a power-type?!”
“That’s your takeaway...?”
I had just treated a girl my own age like a stuffed animal, yet she wasn't even mad. She was technically heavier than the bags of rice I occasionally got stuck carrying for errands, but for some reason, she felt weightless.
“Actually, wait, you are heavy! This is a real workout! My lower back is screaming!”
“Definitely a non-deli! Put me down!”
“Got it.”
I let go. Or rather, she was too heavy to keep holding, so it was more like I dropped her—
“Whoa!”
Koto-chan landed, hopped once or twice on one leg to find her balance, then clung to me.
“Sorry, Koto-chan. You were just seriously heavy.”
“That is not the thing you say after an apology!”
Still clinging to me, Koto-chan glared up at me. It was a piercing gaze, delivered from a very low angle. Since Koto-chan seemed to favor low-elevation spots, I decided to move us to the courtyard and have her sit on the grass.
The school had a beautifully maintained courtyard where many students gathered during lunch, especially the ones who brought their own bentos. In a corner of that courtyard, Koto-chan sat on the grass while I stood before her.
“Look, I don’t care if people say I’m tiny because it’s a fact, but I will not forgive being called heavy.”
“S-sorry, I said.”
Isn't being heavy also a fact? If I said that out loud, she’d probably just scream “Non-deli” at me again.
“Fine, I’ll forgive that too. Now, about the matter I wanted you to understand.”
“Oh, right. What was it again?”
“The part where you said me liking Nono and Lu-kun is the same as how I like you.”
“Right. I mean, you just tell everyone you like them, don't you?”
“It’s not the same! Not at all! My weight might be light, but I am not a light woman!”
Koto-chan glared at me again.
“Look... just look at this.”
Suddenly, her energy plummeted. She tapped away at her phone and turned the screen toward me.
“Your IC money payments... train usage history? Are you sure you should be showing me this—wait.”
From late March to early April, she had been getting on and off at the same station on the same line every single day.
“This line... is this the one where we met? Whoa, and at such an early time every day.”
“Go ahead and laugh if you want. You can think I’m creepy, I don’t care. But I rode the same train at the same time as when I met you every single day! Even though I had no reason to!”
“Wha...?”
That was... completely unexpected.
“I was only on that train by total chance. I haven’t ridden it once since then.”
“I figured. And even if you had been on it, I didn't know which car you’d be in...”
“Probably just not the women-only car.”
“Back then, you just got pulled off the train by that cop. I didn't even know if that was actually your stop.”
For the record, the station where the police officer—Domyoji Ichigo-san—dragged me off was my intended destination.
“I knew I was being stupid. But I wanted to see you so badly that I bet everything on that one-in-a-million chance. Every morning, my heart was racing when I stepped onto that train.”
“...I don't think that’s stupid at all.”
She’d believed in a miracle and braved the morning rush every single day?
“Thanks. I’m the type who shows my feelings through actions.”
Koto-chan tucked her phone away with a solemn expression, but then—
“Think about it! I was getting crushed on a full train and about to die on the floor unnoticed when this kind boy saves me and even gets wrongly accused of being a creep as a punchline to the whole thing and I couldn't get him out of my head but then I try to give up and we meet again in class which is just too romantic for words and anyone would have fallen for you not just me and besides I might be tiny but I’m a first-year in high school just like Nono and Lu-kun so there’s nothing weird about me falling for a guy!”
“Too long! Way too long!”
How did she say all that in one breath?!
“Tochika-kun, didn't you feel the hand of fate?! Don’t think! Feel!”
“‘Don't think,’ she says...”
It’s hard to feel something that just isn't there.
“...I guess I’m just not popular,” Koto-chan muttered, her shoulders slumping.
“Wait, seriously? But you’re so cute.”
“C-cute...!”
Koto-chan’s face went all dreamy and floaty. She was clearly weak against direct compliments.
She held up five fingers on her right hand and three on her left.
“I’ve been confessed to eight times in this life.”
“Setting aside the phrasing that implies you have another life waiting, that’s actually quite a lot. You are popular.”
“But they were all weirdos. They looked serious on the outside, but they all had these scary eyes. Being liked by people like that doesn't count as being ‘popular.’”
“So that’s what you meant by ‘creep-bait.’ But you shouldn't judge people just by their looks.”
Though, I suppose the kind of person who’d fall for someone as tiny as Koto-chan would be—
“I mean, let’s be real. Lolicons? Maybe? Lolicon is a crime.”
True enough—wait, no, being a lolicon itself isn't a crime. As long as you don't act on it illegally, your preferences are your own, I think.
“All eight of them were just my age, or a year older or younger.”
“T-then they aren't lolicons, are they? Like you said, you’re a high school freshman on the inside.”
“Exactly! Not lolicons! So even if you started dating me, you wouldn't be a lolicon or anything, okay?!”
“That’s a separate issue entirely.”
“‘Entirely’?!”
Koto-chan shuffled toward my feet while still sitting. Her face was right in front of my lower body, and it was making me feel... restless.
“Oh, I get it. You don’t believe me. You don't believe I actually fell for you.”
“Ugh... yeah, I guess there’s some of that.”
It just felt so unrealistic, like I was being confessed to by an elementary schooler. It felt like a daughter saying “I’m gonna marry Daddy!” or a little sister saying “I love you, Big Bro!”
“Actually, I’m really good at getting into people’s personal space.”
“Hm? Oh, I can see that. Both physically and mentally.”
She’d closed the distance with Luna effortlessly, after all.
“I will now prove it using my special skill.”
“‘Using’?”
By the time I asked, Koto-chan was already in motion. She closed the gap in an instant, dove into my space, then leaped up and threw her arms around my neck.
“W-wait, Naruse-san! What are you doing?!”
“Not Naruse-san! Koto-chan!”
“F-fine, whatever!”
That wasn't the point. Koto-chan was bringing her face closer and closer to mine. Not just her face—her lips were closing in.
“Oh, come on! A kiss or two won’t kill you!”
“Is that really the line of the person trying to force it?!”
So she was trying to kiss me! I grabbed her shoulders and tried to peel her off, but she wouldn't budge. This girl was surprisingly strong for her size!
“Uh, what are those two doing?”
“Just playing around? Freshmen are so cute.”
“Isn't the boy kind of cute too?”
A few girls who looked like upperclassmen were having a casual conversation nearby.
Excuse me, Onee-sans, I know it’s lunch break, but could you maybe help me out here? And if you could exchange contact info with me after you save me, that would be even better... Wait, is it because I have such ulterior motives that nobody is reaching out to help?
“You’re really resisting! Good! That proves you aren't a lolicon!”
“Since the proof is done, can we stop now?!”
“Since you aren't a lolicon, you’re actually worth making fall for me! If you were a lolicon, it’d be a given that you’d like me. Since you aren't, there’s a real point in taking you down!”
“What kind of logic is that?!”
It was fine if Koto-chan felt a sense of romance from our meeting and reunion and fell for me. With her looks, she could take down a lolicon in seconds. But because I wasn't one, she felt like it was a challenge worth pursuing, which only made her like me more.
...Yeah, this was all very convenient for her.
“J-just... Koto-chan, calm down!”
“Hyan?!”
I wrapped my hands around her incredibly thin waist and forced her up. In that moment, her lips grazed my cheek. Chu.
“T-that was close... You were seriously trying to kiss me?!”
“I don't do things as a joke!”
As I held her, Koto-chan flailed her legs. The people around us still didn't even mistake this for flirting. Most likely because she looked far too much like a child.
“Just... stay still for a second. I’m putting you down.”
I managed to set her back on the grass without dropping her.
“Phew...”
Koto-chan let out a small sigh as she sat there.
“...You were smiling.”
“Eh?”
“When you helped me on that crowded train. You smiled at me, Tochika-kun.”
“...Did I?”
I probably just smiled to reassure someone I thought was an elementary schooler.
“It wasn't like you were just worried about me getting crushed. You smiled with such a kind face. I could even call it beautiful. That was enough to make me fall head over heels.”
“Head over heels, huh?”
Was my smile really that great? Come to think of it, I remember Koto-chan nodding frantically back then. Was she really moved by my smile?
“If things had gone just a little differently, I might have thought, ‘I just got crushed and almost died, what is this guy smiling at?’ but your smile was so lovely that it was safe. Totally safe.”
“You don't need to give me a punchline, Koto-chan.”
But I got what she was saying. My expression had been unexpected, and it had been effective.
“Anyway, I get that you’re serious now. Sorry I didn't believe you.”
“I’m sorry too. I made too much of a scene.”
Koto-chan bowed her head cutely.
“It’s just... I attract weirdos, so I’ve never been able to just like someone normally. I figured that with a body like this, I’d never be able to have a real relationship. I thought that even if I liked someone and confessed, it would never work out.”
“That’s not—”
I cut myself off and sat cross-legged in front of her.
“Come to think of it, I haven’t told you my ‘high school goal’ yet.”
“Wow, we’re really going back in time with the conversation, aren't we?”
“My preference is for tall, mature-looking girls.”
“...The exact opposite of me.”
She glared at me, but I didn't flinch.
“So Tochika-kun’s goal is to get close to tall, mature girls?”
“I guess so. But older women don't usually take me seriously. I mean, they dote on me, but not in a romantic way.”
“Ah, I get it. They probably see you as more of a ‘mommy’s boy’ and look at you with warm, motherly eyes.”
“Non-deli, Koto-chan. But yeah, that’s exactly how it is.”
Even if I do say so myself, I seem to be the type that triggers a woman’s maternal instincts.
“I just tend to get caught up in weird trouble. And that kind of pitiable side seems to make Onee-sans like me.”
“Oh, like being mistaken for a molester or getting tangled up with a weird little kid?”
“Both of those involved you, Koto-chan!”
Even without her, though, I was a trouble magnet. Luna liked to tease me by calling it my “Pitiable Constitution.”
“Anyway, I like tall, mature, sexy girls. Being pampered and led around by an Onee-sans is my ideal.”
“Sharing that much is enough to make a hundred years of love go cold.”
If it made her feelings go cold, then everyone would be happy, but right now I was just sharing the truth to match her seriousness.
“Uuuugh... Tochika-kun, you know I’m serious now, right?”
“Absolutely.”
Even Koto-chan wouldn't try to kiss someone just to tease them.
“Then the real battle starts here.”
Koto-chan stood up with a burst of energy.
“Tochika-kun, even if you aren't a lolicon, I’m still a girl. A sixteen-year-old girl.”
“W-what?”
Koto-chan stared up into my face.
“I’m going to carve into you... just how terrifying it is when I use this loli-looking body as a weapon.”
“Scary!”
She’d even switched to a more aggressive way of addressing me! It sounded like she was planning something incredibly elaborate!
By what twist of fate did I, a die-hard lover of tall beauties, end up being liked by a girl who was 140 centimeters tall...?
I didn't dislike Koto-chan. Her strength despite her small size, and her resilience in using even her tiny stature as a weapon, were impressive.
But she was just so far outside my strike zone...!
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