Chapter 5: The Children's Science Class and the Friends of Class 2-3

Dazai Taishi was one of Torame Kouya's few friends. No, rather than a "friend," the term "partner in crime" might be more accurate. Regardless, Torame Kouya occasionally hung out with Dazai Taishi, his classmate and a certain species of friend.

"Is there anything more divine than a marshmallow roasted over a Bunsen burner? Behold, this magnificent firepower! Hahaha! Watch as the marshmallow turns to charred ash and melts away like a glorious avalanche!!"

After school, in the science room. A sign reading "Science Club in Use" hung on the firmly shut door.

As a phantom member who had only lent his name to the solo Science Club President Dazai Taishi out of friendly obligation, Kouya was, quite unusually, keeping Taishi company during his club activities today. Even calling it "club activities" was a stretch; it was merely a mysterious gathering where they bought marshmallows from the neighborhood convenience store and ate them after roasting them over lab-equipment Bunsen burners.

"Man, I should've brought some coffee."

If I had, I could've tossed a marshmallow in and made a Vienna coffee, Kouya pondered, his thought process permanently wired to cafe menu creation.

"Mmm, truly exquisite."

Spouting such incomprehensible nonsense, Taishi bit into his perfectly charred marshmallow. Lightly scorched by the burner, the marshmallow's gooey center practically melted in his mouth.

Just as these two healthy high school boys were savoring the illicit thrill of doing something they absolutely shouldn't be doing, the science room door was suddenly and violently thrown open.

"Hey!! What the hell are you boys doing in here?!"

A middle-aged man's booming, furious roar echoed through the science room. The one who had flung the door open in a blind rage was the demonic head of their grade.

☆

"And so, as a consequence, the very existence and budget of the Science Club are currently being called into question by the upper echelons of our academy."

"In other words, you reaped what you sowed."

In the Class 2-3 classroom, Class Representative Higuchi Hitoha fired a frosty retort at Dazai Taishi, who had just recounted the turn of events in an incredibly grave tone.

Hitoha's assessment was entirely spot-on. A teacher had caught them buying marshmallows with club funds to roast and eat, leading to a staff meeting debate over the blatant misuse of the club budget. —It was the absolute definition of reaping what you sow.

Taishi groaned in profound agony. "If things remain as they are, the Science Club's funding will be completely severed!"

"Like I said, you reaped what you sowed." Hitoha remained ruthlessly cold.

In the corner of the classroom right after homeroom had ended, while everyone else was packing up to go home, Dazai Taishi clenched his fist and passionately argued his case.

"If our funding is severed, our grand Science Club will face the very real peril of abolishment!"

"And what does that have to do with me?"

"Hear me out, Hitoha-kun! I absolutely cannot allow the inherited bloodline of our traditional Science Club to perish during my tenure! In order to secure the club's survival, we must widely demonstrate the immense contributions the Science Club provides to our academy!"

"...I was only listening to your complaining out of the goodness of my heart as your seat neighbor, but since the vibe is getting incredibly shady, can I just bounce now, Torame-kun?"

"Don't drag me into this!"

Sensing the ominous aura of an impending massive headache, Kouya grabbed his bag and tried to flee the scene.

"Listen to my plea, my dear friend!" Grab. Taishi clamped a hand onto his shoulder. "Prestige, social contribution, increased public awareness... In order to restore our honor, we must elevate our neighborhood reputation through a scientifically altruistic endeavor. Thus, we shall host a Children's Science Class! However! I cannot possibly manage a grand-scale event like a science class all by my lonesome!!"

"...You're practically a one-man army when it comes to Science Club members, right? Ain't that what you've always bragged about? Then stop dragging other people into your mess."

"My dear friend. I must insist you fulfill your duties as a phantom member."

"............"

"Why avert your eyes?"

"Look, just 'cause I'm basically in the going-home club doesn't mean I got all the free time in the world..."

"Have you already forgotten the exquisite taste of the marshmallow you consumed?"

"............"

"Also, I recall you owing me a debt regarding the matter with Shizuishi Kiyoko-kun."

"............"

Struck exactly where it hurt, Kouya fell dead silent. Back when Kiyoko and Meika had gotten into a fight over cleaning duties, Kouya had indeed incurred a debt to Taishi.

Casting a sidelong glance at the silenced Kouya, Taishi turned back to Hitoha.

"Hitoha-kun, you are implicated as well."

"...I am completely and utterly unrelated to this, right?" Suddenly thrust into the spotlight, Hitoha's eyes darted around unnaturally.

Heh. Taishi pushed up the bridge of his glasses. "Would it not be heartless and utterly irresponsible to simply walk away after hearing of my plight? And in Asakusa, the very city of compassion and humanity, no less."

"No, no, absolutely not! Why in the world do I have to take responsibility for you, Dazai-kun?!"

"Did you not thrust your nose into the affair between Shizuishi-kun and Meika-kun entirely unprompted, thereby causing even further chaos?"

"............!"

"Debts must be paid. A diligent student such as yourself surely understands this philosophy."

Told off by Taishi, Hitoha let out a resigned sigh. "...Fine, whatever. I'll help you out this one time. But if you're bringing up debts, shouldn't you be making the two actual parties involved help out too?"

"The involved parties... meaning Shizuishi-kun, and more importantly, Meika-kun, eh..."

Resting a hand on his chin, Taishi fell deep into thought. As previously established, Dazai Taishi harbored an incredibly one-sided crush on Shiga Meika. After stewing in various unsavory schemes, the solo Science Club President twisted his lips into a smirk.

"Mmm. A brilliant proposal. It serves as the absolute perfect pretext for me to spend time with Meika-kun! Fulfilling the objective of ensuring the Science Club's survival whilst simultaneously satisfying my deepest desire to trigger a youth romance event with Meika-kun... 'Tis the very definition of killing two birds with one stone!"

And so, due to all that nonsense, Kiyoko and Meika found themselves roped into participating in this "Children's Science Class"—an event abruptly thrown together so the Science Club President could farm approval points from the teachers.

It seemed Kiyoko and Meika shared a mutual understanding that their previous fight had caused trouble for Taishi, because both of them agreed to help out with the Children's Science Class without refusing. And because he was vaguely worried about the two of them, Kouya ultimately ended up helping to run the science class as well.

"It is quite simple. You merely need to fulfill the duties assigned to your respective stations within the science room. And naturally, I expect you to be capable of explaining the scientific logic behind your experiments."

After school, in the science room. Standing before Kiyoko, Meika, Hitoha, and Kouya, Taishi—having just finished writing out everyone's assignments on the chalkboard—began his sonorous explanation.

"Meika-kun, you shall be in charge of tossing roses into liquid nitrogen!" Taishi doled out the roles, leaving no room for debate.

"Shizuishi-kun, your duty is to chase the children around with statically charged balloons!" No objections to the division of labor were permitted.

"Hitoha-kun, you shall hold the test tubes, dim the lights, and scream the magical incantation, 'Chemiluminescence!'" He aggressively pushed the assignments onto them in rapid succession.

"And Kouya, you are tasked with teaching modern children who have never used one how to operate an alcohol burner!"

Hearing Taishi announce the assignments for everyone, Kiyoko tilted her head slightly.

"Isn't Kouya-kun's role exceedingly simple compared to the rest, merely lighting an alcohol burner?"

In response to her perfectly reasonable question, Taishi cast his eyes down in mock sorrow.

"There is a phrase: the right man for the right job. —Which is to say, you may safely assume this division of labor is directly proportional to each person's science grades. We must explain the logic of our respective performances to the attending children and their parents, after all. Asking my dear friend Kouya to explain chemical luminescence like Hitoha-kun is doing would simply be asking the impossible."

"How the hell do you know my science grades?!" Kouya retorted fiercely.

—However, he didn't actually refuse the alcohol burner duty. If they were handing him an easy station, he was more than happy to accept it.

Just as Taishi said, there was such a thing as the right man for the right job. He absolutely wanted zero part in trying to explain chemical luminescence or molecular excitation or whatever.

"As for myself, I shall be busy producing vacuums and generating superconductivity, so do not hesitate to summon me should anything go awry."

Shutting down any further arguments, Taishi distributed the assignments and proceeded to give each member a private lecture on their specific performance.

—And then, on a national holiday in July just before summer break. The Children's Science Class finally commenced.

"Alrighty, eyes up here! I'm gonna dunk this rose into the liquid nitrogen now!"

"This is static electricity. You can hear it crackling, can you not?"

"Chemiluminescence is a form of light emission utilizing the excited state of fluorescent substances, and what I will be demonstrating for you today is specifically known as luminol chemiluminescence..."

Right next to Meika and Kiyoko, who were breezing through their acts with practiced flair, Hitoha was dead-seriously explaining the details of her experiment to the visiting children.

Despite being an abruptly organized event with almost zero advertising period, the science class was fairly bustling. In an era of high inflation where folks didn't have much spare cash, the word "Free" possessed a magical ring capable of attracting a certain demographic all on its own. And if it was an educational event like a "Science Class," all the more so.

Parents who had caught wind of a high school in the neighborhood hosting a children's science class came flocking over, using the free event as a way to kill time with their young kids.

"Hey mister, what's that?"

Two boys, looking to be around early elementary school age, walked up to Kouya's table where his alcohol burner was set up.

"It's called an alcohol burner. Apparently, you modern runts don't know how to use these things, so I'm gonna teach you. You guys know how to strike a match?"

Kouya asked the kids, totally talking down to them. His science grades might have been terrible, but he was great at survival stuff like starting a fire outdoors.

""Nope!"" The two boys shook their heads in perfect unison.

Heh. Kouya boasted proudly. "Exactly as I predicted. Being the sharp guy I am, I researched just how clumsy kids these days are beforehand, so I totally expected you wouldn't be able to strike a match. Knowing this might happen, I prepared a utility lighter specifically for kiddos who can't handle matches!"

Kouya proudly presented a brand-new utility lighter he had purchased at a nearby home center. In response to the alcohol burner attendant's theatrical display, the two boys exchanged a glance.

""What's a utility lighter?"" They asked him with completely straight faces.

Naturally, this was entirely outside Kouya's calculations.

"...Wait, what? You guys seriously don't know what a utility lighter is?"

"Nope. Do you?"

"Yeah. I don't know either."

As the boys chattered, Kouya genuinely started to panic. "You guys can't start a fire with flint, right? And if you can't use matches, and you don't even know what a lighter is, you wouldn't even be able to cook curry at a campground! What are you planning to eat out there?!"

"What are you talking about, mister? Just use a portable gas stove."

"Or better yet, just order Uber Eats to the campsite. My dad said we gotta use convenient services to keep the economy moving."

These little brats...

"Low-key flexing your comfortable lifestyle by saying you use Uber Eats on the regular is honestly way more annoying and sarcastic than saying your butler came to pick you up in a Benz..."

While Kouya was muttering his monologue under his breath...

"Oh yeah, mister. Forgot to tell you, but over there..."

One of the boys tugged on Kouya's shirt and pointed toward the tables by the windows in the science room. Kouya grimaced.

"What's over there?"

"Those girls over there are fighting. Are we supposed to just ignore them?" the boy informed him.

To the boy's well-meaning notification...

"Haaah?!" Kouya yelled in disbelief.

—Let us rewind the clock slightly.

The spark that ignited Kiyoko and Meika's argument was, predictably, something incredibly petty.

Meika had been conducting flash-freezing experiments using liquid nitrogen in the corner of the science room, but suddenly, the flow of customers came to a dead stop, leaving her with nothing to do. Figuring this was the perfect chance to take a break, she took a breath—and that was when it happened.

Thump. A child running around blindly crashed right into her back.

"Whoa!"

Losing her balance, the girl's arm carelessly bumped into a beaker on the desk. In the very next moment, the beaker began a freefall toward the floor.

A beat later, with a loud smash, the beaker slammed into the linoleum and shattered.

"............"

She stared hard at the shattered beaker at her feet for a few seconds. Timidly, she scanned her surroundings. Everyone was busy attending to guests at their respective stations; no one seemed to be paying any attention to Meika.

"...Alright. No one saw that, right?"

Meika carefully picked up the shards of the broken beaker, wrapped them in a stack of old newspapers, and tossed them into the non-combustible trash bin.

She figured she didn't really need to report this to Taishi or the teachers. Equipment getting broken in the science room happened all the time; she didn't think there was any real obligation to tattle on herself.

—By Meika's own personal judgment, that was how she decided to handle the situation.

Closing the lid of the trash can, Meika tried to return to her station, but suddenly stopped when she felt someone staring at her. Turning her head toward the gaze, she locked eyes with Kiyoko in the neighboring booth.

"...I am not quite sure about that behavior." Shizuishi Kiyoko said with a disapproving frown.

From Kiyoko's perspective, she had said it out of concern for Meika, but it struck a massive nerve with the girl.

"If you got a problem with me, say it to my face."

"I could not possibly. It is something you, Shiga-san, simply must be mindful of on your own."

"You've got a complaint, don't you?"

Marching right up to Kiyoko, Meika glared down the transfer student from Kyoto. In stark contrast to the fiercely intimidating Meika, Kiyoko didn't move a single muscle in her face, politely denying the accusation.

"I have no such thing."

"Liar."

"If you have something weighing on your conscience, you should simply fix it. Taking your anger out on me is completely unjustified."

"I was wrong for breaking the beaker! And I was wrong for trying to hide it! But that's that, and this is this! I'm telling you I can't stand your smug, condescending attitude!"

"Is that not a separate issue entirely?"

"Yeah, you're damn right it's a separate issue! I'll apologize to Taishi and the teacher for breaking the beaker and trying to cover it up, so you apologize to me for being a sarcastic brat! That's only fair, right?!"

"Sarcastic...? Whenever did I say anything sarcastic to you, Shiga-san? Please refrain from throwing false accusations at me like a common scammer looking for a payout."

"Just now! You literally just did it!!"

"Are you sure this is not merely your own persecution complex? If a hospital in Kyoto is acceptable, I would be happy to recommend an excellent doctor for you. For your head, that is."

Slipping and sliding around the argument, Kiyoko only poured more fuel onto the fire.

Meika had only accidentally broken a beaker, yet the malice was rapidly spiraling out of control into a completely different direction. Unable to withstand the increasingly hostile atmosphere between the two girls, the elementary schoolers lingering at Kiyoko's booth ran away.

Paying no mind to that whatsoever, Kiyoko and Meika kept glaring at one another.

Meika jutted her chin toward the door. "Step outside, transfer student! I'm gonna beat some manners right into you!"

"Goodness, how frightening. So hot-blooded."

"I wouldn't lose a second of sleep even if you hated my guts!"

"You talk a big game. With an attitude like that, your beloved crush will eventually run far away from you, you know."

"! Why you little—!"

At Kiyoko's words, Meika's face flushed bright red with fury. The atmosphere had reached rock bottom.

Just a millisecond before the hair-trigger standoff between the Kyotoite and the Edokko exploded into an all-out inferno—

"What the hell are you doing?! Wait, you guys are fighting again?!"

The voice of a third boy cleaved right between the two girls. Dragged over by the elementary schoolers who had fled the scene moments earlier, Torame Kouya had flown in to intervene. The two fighting girls instantly put on guilty expressions, looking exactly like dogs caught in the middle of tearing up the furniture.

"Every single time, you two pull the exact same crap without ever learning your lesson! Give it a damn rest already!!"

And with that, Torame Kouya forcefully dropped the hammer of wrath upon the two unrepentant girls.

"I've really gone and done it now..."

Inside the science preparation room, Kiyoko let out a massive sigh.

A sign reading "On Break" hung on the door of the prep room. Out in the main science room, the Children's Science Class was continuing on, completely unchanged from moments before.

To separate Meika and Kiyoko, Kouya had dragged Kiyoko into the prep room under the guise of taking a break. Meika, meanwhile, was out in the science room with Taishi and Hitoha.

Now that they had cooled down, the situation was exactly as one might expect: the participants of that utterly pointless argument were deeply regretting it. Meika, currently being placated by Taishi, was undoubtedly feeling the exact same way.

Listening vaguely to the cheers of the children echoing from the next room, Kiyoko looked up at the ceiling.

"I am feeling rather disgusted with myself."

Another heavy sigh, the umpteenth one, vanished into the air of the prep room. Just beyond the single door, the science class continued, filled with the joyful voices of the children.

"I believe I have simply spent too much of my life constantly walking on eggshells around the adults around me. Speaking the unvarnished truth only creates friction, so I hide my true intentions behind my words. However, I am nowhere near as shrewd as my father, and I cannot completely conceal the emotions themselves. I suppose that is why I inevitably end up clashing with people like Shiga-san."

Along with her self-analysis, Kiyoko let out a grumble regarding the upbringing that had forged her current personality. She—the girl known as Shizuishi Kiyoko—had always been this way. Even when she thought she was navigating things cleverly, she was ultimately a girl who only knew how to live a clumsy life.

Leaning against the wall of the prep room, Kouya scratched his head.

"Why do you only ever call out Meika like that, Kiyoko-san?"

"I wanted her to realize her faults on her own, but in my attempts to convey it subtly, I ended up failing spectacularly."

"Yeah, but why only Meika?"

"...I merely wanted to support your romance."

"Whose romance?" Kouya's eyes half-closed in disbelief. Why on earth were they suddenly talking about that?

"Whose, you ask—"

Looking slightly troubled, Kiyoko's gaze wandered. She hesitated, debating whether she should actually say it out loud or not.

If those two became a wonderful couple, then she could finally give up and perhaps even offer them her full support. Kiyoko cast her eyes down. The sunlight streaming through the window caught her long eyelashes, casting delicate shadows across her pale cheeks.

"...Yours and Shiga-san's. I suppose I might be viewing things through the eyes of an overbearing mother-in-law. But I simply want Shiga-san to become someone I can entrust you to with absolute peace of mind."

"............Uh. Haven't you been misunderstanding something on a fundamental level, Kiyoko-san?"

For a while now, there had been signs that Kiyoko was massively misinterpreting the relationship between Kouya and Meika. And it was based entirely on this colossal misunderstanding that she had been showing this bizarre, unsolicited consideration.

"Kiyoko-san, are you seriously trying to play matchmaker for me and Meika?"

"............"

"Hit the nail on the head? Look, I don't know what kind of misconception you're harboring, but we're literally just neighborhood kids. We're seriously just childhood friends, nothing more."

A beat after Kouya's words landed, utter bewilderment spread across Kiyoko's face.

"But whenever you are with Shiga-san, Kouya-kun, you act so completely natural..."

"That just proves I'm not overly conscious of her, doesn't it?"

"............Is that so?"

"Yeah, it is," Kouya nodded affirmatively.

Thrust with this eye-opening reality, Kiyoko's confusion only deepened.

"Wait, then what am I supposed to do...? Is there no need for me to support Shiga-san and Kouya-kun? Did I merely say something unnecessary to Shiga-san and earn her hatred for absolutely nothing? Then how am I supposed to interact with you, Kouya-kun...? Does this mean I do not have to give up on you...?"

Kiyoko muttered frantically to herself. The core premise governing all her recent actions was crumbling into dust.

She didn't have to hold back for Meika's sake anymore? But even so, it didn't change the fact that Kouya still hadn't remembered their promise—

—But still, I am quite sure Shiga-san has feelings for Kouya-kun.

Yet, even if Meika harbored feelings for Kouya, if Kouya didn't reciprocate those feelings in the slightest, there was no reason for Kiyoko to back down.

In that case, what about her own feelings? What about the feelings of Shizuishi Kiyoko?

She didn't want to pretend the feelings she had unilaterally nurtured for ten long years simply didn't exist.

—That was the undeniable, unvarnished truth in Shizuishi Kiyoko's heart.

But even so, what was she supposed to do from here on out...?

Standing beside the Kyoto girl who had plunged headfirst into a labyrinth of her own thoughts, Kouya glanced at a haphazardly placed globe and decided to tackle the immediate problem at hand.

"Look, Kiyoko-san. For now, just go apologize to Meika."

"............"

"You're thinking you went too far, right? I'm pretty sure Meika's feeling the exact same way."

"How could you possibly know that, Kouya-kun?"

"...I've known her a long time."

"............"

Kiyoko lifted her head and stared intently at Kouya. Their eyes met. The very next moment, for some inexplicable reason, she burst into a light giggle.

"Please stop that. Right after declaring you are merely childhood friends, you go and make me jealous." She laughed, half-joking.

Kouya frowned. "...What does that even mean?"

"Exactly what I said. You were essentially bragging that you and Shiga-san share a history that I know absolutely nothing about. It is only natural I would feel a little jealous."

"............"

Unsure of how to respond, Kouya was left completely speechless. Then again, these were the words of a girl whose specialty was wrapping people in smoke and mirrors. Perhaps it was best not to take them too seriously.

Kouya remained without an answer. Kiyoko remained in her hesitation.

A brief silence fell over the science prep room. Gazed upon by a row of creepy anatomical models with their internal organs fully exposed, an indescribably awkward stretch of time ticked by.

Tick, tock. The sound of the wall clock's second hand carving out the time echoed in the quiet.

After a moment of deliberation, Kiyoko made her resolve and stood up.

"————It cannot be helped. I shall go speak with Shiga-san."

Before Kouya could even react, Kiyoko opened the door to the prep room. At that exact same moment, it seemed someone on the other side was attempting to open the door as well.

"Ah."

The two girls who had reached for the handle simultaneously found themselves face-to-face the moment the door swung open.

Shiga Meika was standing right there. What impeccable timing.

""............""

Another agonizingly awkward silence dropped. Someone had to be the first to speak. But neither wanted it to be them. If possible, they wanted the other person to start the conversation.

A bizarre battle of pride and silent negotiation played out between the two girls. Just as Kouya was debating whether he should throw them a lifeline, Meika took a deep breath.

The downtown Tokyo girl broke the silence first.

"You've got something you want to say to me, don't you?"

Glaring at her with a challenging look, Meika spoke up. Kiyoko slightly tilted her head.

"I believe the same applies to you, Shiga-san."

"Yeah. But you go first."

"Please, after you, Shiga-san."

"............"

Silence descended between Kiyoko and Meika once again.

Ten seconds passed. Twenty seconds passed.

"Argh, enough!" Meika hit her limit first. "Fine, whatever! I'll say it first!"

"That is exactly why I offered you the floor."

"...You seriously know how to grind my gears every single time," Meika grumbled as she turned to face Kiyoko properly. "I took it too far."

"Those are my lines," Kiyoko replied, before immediately tacking on a completely unnecessary addition: "Though, it was originally your fault to begin with, Shiga-san."

"Yeah, true. It was my fault. The beaker incident was entirely my screw-up. But you picked a fight with me using entirely uncalled-for sarcasm."

"I won't deny it."

"Then deny it!"

"Do you want me to?"

"Maybe not."

"I thought as much."

"............"

After intensely staring each other down, Meika let out a massive sigh.

"I think I finally get it."

"?"

"You're just 'that kind of person,' aren't you, Shizuishi-san."

Coming to an understanding entirely on her own, Shiga Meika stretched her stiff shoulders out.

"Man, this is so stupid. I should've realized it sooner. I finally figured out that getting mad at a girl like you is like punching a curtain—it's a total waste of my energy. So from now on, no matter what kind of snarky crap you throw my way, I'm just gonna casually ignore anything that gets on my nerves. Keep that in mind, yeah?" Meika declared with exaggerated flair.

"I suppose that is perfectly fine. But please do tell me if you ever desire my attention." Flashing a polite smile, Kiyoko played along.

————Had they actually reconciled, or hadn't they?

Though Kouya couldn't fully comprehend the subtle intricacies between the two of them, Kiyoko and Meika walked back to the Children's Science Class together, side by side.

And as Kouya was left standing all alone in the prep room, the reality of the situation slowly began to crash over him.

Namely: the fact that up until this exact moment, Kiyoko had genuinely believed that he and Meika were mutually in love, and had been secretly rooting for them to get together all this time.

"Right. So Kiyoko-san was just cheering for us completely on her own, huh..."

For some reason, Kiyoko's pure, unadulterated goodwill was filling the boy with a profound sense of emptiness.

So that's all I am to her, he thought.

In other words, to Kiyoko, Kouya was nothing more than a guy she was perfectly fine seeing end up with another childhood friend. If Kouya had gotten together with someone else, Kiyoko fully intended to offer them her blessing.

A heartfelt "Congratulations."

"Somehow, that just really pisses me off."

He couldn't precisely explain what was causing it, or exactly why it rubbed him the wrong way, but he knew one thing for sure: he absolutely hated it.

————Right. This was almost certainly an emotional problem.

And so, the Kyotoite Shizuishi Kiyoko and the Asakusa downtowner Shiga Meika had, for all intents and purposes, reconciled.

—However, that did not mean the Kyotoite and the Edokko had suddenly achieved a profound mutual understanding.

When all was said and done, they were exactly the same as always.

"Shiga-san, could you grab an oshipin from the teacher's podium for me? The human rights slogan poster is starting to peel off," Kiyoko asked Meika, who happened to be nearby. It was right after homeroom had ended in the Class 2-3 classroom.

Hearing the request, Meika scowled in evident displeasure. "What the heck is an oshipin?"

"Pardon? An oshipin is an oshipin, no? It is the name of the flat, circular piece of stationery equipped with a needle used to pin down paper." Kiyoko answered, genuinely puzzled as to why Meika was even asking.

Her brow still furrowed, Meika shot back, "Nobody calls it an oshipin over here."

"Then what do you call it?"

"A gabyou, obviously! Is there even any other word for it?"

"That is exactly why I said oshipin."

"It's a gabyou! A gabyou!"

"You push it in to pin things, so it is an oshipin (push-pin), is it not?"

"I don't speak your weird dialect!"

"...Wait, oshipin is a dialect? I had no idea."

Shocked by the revelation, Kiyoko looked genuinely appalled. Meika heaved a wildly exaggerated sigh.

"You seriously have zero intention of fixing all these expressions that don't fly here in the Kanto region, do you? Just the other day you called our footwear uwagutsu!"

"Excuse me? Uwagutsu are uwagutsu. What else could you possibly call them?"

"Uwabaki!" Meika shouted, stomping her school-issued indoor shoes against the floor to make her point.

Kiyoko put on an utterly unconvinced expression. "They are shoes (kutsu). And you wear them up (uwa) inside the building. Therefore, uwagutsu is the far more accurate term, is it not?"

"We call them uwabaki over here! Seriously, have you never heard the phrase 'When in Rome, do as the Romans do'?"

"Of course I know it."

"We're in Asakusa, so adapt to my language!"

"Why should I? I merely intend to walk my own path. Though, if you were to act as a proper role model for me, Shiga-san, I might just consider learning the customs of Tokyo."

"————You are so irritatingly sarcastic!!"

"I suppose it is simply my nature."

Kouya watched from afar, his eyes half-closed as he observed the endlessly evasive Kiyoko and Meika, who looked about ready to burst a blood vessel dealing with her.

They were exactly the same as always, but since the animosity wasn't nearly as severe as before, the atmosphere didn't feel like it required any intervention.

"My dear friend."

Stopping his hands from packing his bag, Kouya, who had been absently listening to the two girls bicker, snapped back to reality when his name was suddenly called from behind.

"Taishi..."

The notoriously troublesome Solo Science Club President, Dazai Taishi, was marching over to Kouya's desk with his bag in hand.

"I give you my deepest thanks for your assistance with the Children's Science Class the other day. Thanks to your efforts, our reputation among both the faculty and the local parents is stellar. It appears the Science Club shall survive to see another day."

"Well, that's great."

"Though it may be a meager token of my gratitude, please accept this."

Taishi tossed whatever he was holding directly to Kouya.

"? A charm?"

Looking down at the object he'd caught, Kouya tilted his head. It was a round little amulet with a picture of a beckoning cat on it.

"An amulet from Imado Shrine," Taishi announced proudly.

Imado Shrine was a famous shrine in Asakusa. Since it enshrined the deities Izanagi-no-Mikoto and Izanami-no-Mikoto—a married couple of gods—it was renowned as a shrine for matchmaking and good relationships.

And if it was an amulet from that shrine...

"So this is a matchmaking charm for romantic success?" Kouya asked, twisting the beckoning cat charm in his hand.

Heh. Twisting his lips, Taishi let out a cynical chuckle. "Precisely. Consider it a reward for your assistance. I originally purchased it for myself, but alas, an amulet for romantic success is simply ill-suited for a man such as I."

"Because it's unscientific?"

"Incorrect." Taishi immediately shut him down, wagging a finger back and forth. "Science and faith are not necessarily mutually exclusive. Modern science cannot outright deny the existence of a God."

"Oh, right." Sensing a full-blown lecture brewing, Kouya tried to brush him off with complete disinterest. "So if I carry this charm around, the gods are gonna hook me up with a good match?"

"Indubitably. That is how the system functions."

"Then why are you giving it to me? It's yours, isn't it?"

"I am giving it to you because I have absolutely no need for it, my friend. —Listen closely. Assuming my destined partner is Meika-kun..."

"Isn't the foundational premise of your deductive reasoning already completely screwed up?"

"It is not screwed up in the slightest! Hear me out! Assuming my destined partner is Meika-kun, I have already encountered her. This is an undeniable fact."

"If Professor Taishi says so."

"In other words, one could say our ties of fate have already been bound."

"...Have they really?"

"Indeed they have! To beseech the gods of matchmaking for a good match when my ties of fate are already securely bound would be a grave insult to the magnificent relationship Meika-kun and I have already forged!"

"It ain't forged at all, man."

"Therefore, I am relinquishing this matchmaking amulet!"

"Listen to what people are telling you."

"And that, my dear friend, is my final conclusion!"

"............Leaving your completely incomprehensible riddle of a theory aside, why give it to me?"

"As I said, it is your reward for the other day."

"Don't try to pawn off your useless hand-me-down charm on me to cheap out on a real reward!"

"My brilliant mind sees right through you! I know you are secretly yearning for a destined partner you have yet to meet!!"

"You just cooked up some half-baked logic so you could cheap out and dump your leftovers on me..." Kouya grumbled, half-glaring at him.

In short, Taishi was too cheap to buy him a bottle of juice as a thank-you, and had opted to foist an unwanted amulet onto him instead.

"Do refrain from returning the amulet, Kouya. To reject it would be a terrible slight against the eight million gods. —I have successfully delivered your reward for the other day. Farewell, my dear friend!"

Completely ignoring Kouya's complaints, Taishi grabbed his bag and swiftly exited the classroom in a dramatic sweep.

Left behind, Kouya stared intently at the amulet resting in his palm.

"Matchmaking, huh..."

It was an attribute he currently had absolutely zero desire to pray to the gods for.

————Torame Kouya, sixteen years old.

He wasn't particularly devout, but he wasn't sacrilegious either. In short, the boy possessed just enough common sense and decency to avoid throwing an amulet he'd been given straight into the trash.

For the time being, Kouya simply shoved the so-called matchmaking charm forced upon him by his bad-news buddy into his pocket.