Chapter 4
I think human thought is like a movie theater.
At any given moment, for example, during a lecture, a movie related to that lecture plays in my mind; when I'm cooking, a movie about cooking plays. It's as if the screen in my brain is showing a movie each time. The higher the quality of the movie, the more I feel the quality of what I'm doing at that moment improves.
Of course, there are times when noise disrupts the image, but then I wonder, what exactly is this noise?
If it's information that's not really worth turning into a movie, something insignificant, then... no, I don't think that's the case.
Why? Because it's not insignificant.
The noise in my mind right now, most of it, concerns my rival, Yanagi Ritsuka.
Whether I'm in a lecture, taking a shower, eating, or about to sleep, her face—mostly her smile—suddenly flashes in my mind like a bright flash of light, only to fade away.
(It's different from when she was my enemy...)
Even four years ago, when Yanagi was known as the "White Sorcerer," I used to imagine her a lot. But back then, those thoughts were more about simulating her attacks and abilities as the "White Sorcerer," and I can say without a doubt that I never paid attention to her expression. But now, her face is burned into my memory.
(Could it be that I... like Yanagi? No, that can't be... It's impossible.)
We haven't even been reunited for a month, and yet here I am, becoming infatuated. I'm not the type to fall in love easily, and more importantly, I don't have a reason to. I think Yanagi's smile is cute, but I don't think that's enough to make someone—especially someone of the opposite sex—fall in love. Well, wait...
(I've never really liked a girl before... now that I think about it.)
There were plenty of female agents in the Shishima Organization, and even now, I have some female acquaintances in my seminar whom I talk to occasionally. It's not like I haven't had the opportunity to interact with girls in my life.
But I've never had the intense desire to actually date someone or fall deeply in love. So, I could say that I don't even have the right to talk about why people fall in love...
(The reason I went to that group date was to get a girlfriend, but looking back, it was a vague reason. I just wanted the status...)
What I really wanted was the fact that I had a girlfriend. I ignored the process of actually learning to like that person. Now, I don't want that kind of "fact" anymore.
...Huh. Why don't I want it?
"Saigawa! Get over here and stop spacing out!"
"Haha, you don't even try to hide that you're troubled. You're an easy-to-read guy."
"Sorry, Gori-san. Keep quiet, Kuyama."
My neighbor in the student apartment I live in is Morino Gori san. He's a year ahead of me, currently a fourth-year student, though he’s repeating a year, so he's a bit older than me and Kuyama. His name sounds like 'gorilla in the forest,' so I call him Gori-san.
But in reality, Gori-san looks like a scrawny chicken and sports a bright red mohawk. His clothes seem to be inspired by punk rock, often wearing black leather. Overall, there's no gorilla-like aura about him.
He's a fun senior who often hangs out with me and Kuyama, despite his appearance...
"Uh, what were we talking about again?"
"Saigawa~~. You were supposed to talk about how the modified gas gun feels, right?"
One of Gori-san's hobbies is illegally modifying commercial airsoft guns and gas guns to the point that possessing them would get him arrested. His hobby is... well, unique.
I often review the performance of these modified guns. I never hold back in my reviews.
"Personally, I think the blowback is kind of disappointing. It feels cheap. The sound is so overdone... like it's constantly trying to show off that it just blew back."
As I said that, I fired a shot from the gas gun in my hand at the target hanging on the wall. I purposely missed.
"Hahaha! You sure do speak your mind! For a beginner, too! I like it! Mwah~♡"
I instinctively dodged Gori-san's air kiss. It felt more dangerous than any bullet.
"Thanks."
And I'm not a beginner... I'm more knowledgeable about guns than most people due to my background, which is why I approached Gori-san when I saw him testing a gun in the apartment yard. We became friends right away. I'm not exactly an angel either.
Well, I know that Gori-san's main focus is on modifications, and he never shoots people or animals, nor does he sell them, so that's why I feel comfortable sharing my opinions with him.
"I don't get it. What's so fun about guns? Anyway, Gori-senpai, why don't we dive into Saigawa's troubles? This one's a real gem, literally."
"Ah, fine. The room of the authorities isn't a counseling room, but I'll listen."
Gori-san's room is decorated with modified guns on the walls and shelves, so it's definitely not the kind of place you'd expect to share your troubles.
"Ugh, I don't even want to talk about it... Well, this is actually about a friend of mine..."
"So, you're talking about me? Haha, now I'm really curious."
"Saigawa! Don't waste time with unnecessary pride. Your social life is practically dead anyway."
"Alright, alright, it's actually my problem! Recently, I just can't stop thinking about this girl! Seriously, it's driving me nuts! Ah, is it love?! It's love, right?!"
I decided to completely come clean. But thinking about it, Kuyama has a fear of women, and I've never heard of Gori-san having a girlfriend, so... is it really worth asking these two for advice?
"I see. I’ve been smelling something about you recently, Saigawa... So that’s what it is."
"Hey, hold on a second. What do you mean, 'smelling like a woman'?"
That was a pretty frightening thing to say so casually. What the hell, Kuyama? What’s with your nose?
"This is ridiculous! Saigawa! Let me tell you the solution!"
"The solution? What exactly am I supposed to solve?"
"What you need is to figure out if this feeling you have is actually love, right?"
"Well... I guess that might be it. But don’t call it just a passing fancy so quickly."
The reason I keep thinking about Yanagi is probably because I want to settle the score, once and for all. I don't want to lose to her, that's for sure. But is that really why her face keeps appearing in my mind? I don't know if it's love, so I do want to figure it out.
"Saigawa~"
"Saigawa."
"Yeah?"
For some reason, Gori-san and Kuyama's voices synchronized perfectly. Huh? Did they have time to coordinate that?
"'Just jerk off and go to sleep...!!'"
"Don't mess with meeeee────────────!!!"
Their voices overlapped perfectly, and what on earth were they saying? I couldn't understand it.
"What do you mean, 'jerk off and go to sleep'?! No, come on... You know, that thing! You get it, right? No need to say it out loud!"
"Don't get it, huh~?"
"Well, you gotta say it properly, you know."
"I jerk off and sleep every damn day!!"
So that was what they meant. This is what university guys are like. Almost certainly.
So, it couldn't really be called a solution. Because, well... they do it every day!
"Not enough words, huh. Kuyama~! You explain it properly!"
"Alright. So, Saigawa, your confusion might come from sexual desire. Yeah, a guy who doesn’t get any attention, all his confusion is 100% driven by lust. Even if he's popular, love still comes from sexual desire, but anyway... Try jerking off while thinking about that underclassman and see how you feel after you sleep."
"You're saying some messed-up stuff... I can't even explain what's messed up, but..."
"Well, if you can’t stop thinking about her after that, then it’s okay to call it love. But if you jerk off and just don't care afterward, well, you were just fantasizing about her, that's all."
"You know, a young guy's thought process is mostly driven by sexual impulses. The stuff that remains after releasing that impulse is surprisingly honest psychologically. And I’m not joking."
Tch... What are these two talking about? Just when I thought they were messing around, they were actually making some sense.
There might be some truth to this. When I think about it, Yanagi’s hair color is exotic, but her face is incredibly cute. She's slender, elegant, and carries herself with grace. If you look at her in general, she's definitely a beauty, or at least... she fits my type. Yeah.
If I were to admit that I’m that kind of scumbag, well, at least it’s easy to understand. It’s sad, but I don’t think of myself as a particularly beautiful person. Just your average college student, nothing special.
"…Alright. I… I’ll jerk off and sleep thinking about her."
So, I gave a rather serious reply when—
"Hahahaha!! What is this guy saying~~!!"
"Hee-hee-hee-hee!! R-recorded it! I just recorded that! Let’s upload it online!!"
"I’ll beat the crap out of you guys!!"
In the end, I realized I’d been completely teased.
＊
"Saigawa-kun—"
Yanagi stood before me, her body barely concealed by a thin bedsheet, gazing at me with strangely damp eyes.
With each creak of the bed, she inched closer, closing the gap between us to nothing.
I remained motionless, as if I had become a fixed-point camera, my eyes roaming over her body without restraint.
"Hey... Look at me more?"
Her hands cupped my cheeks, and my gaze was drawn to her lips, now shaped into an almost bewitching smile.
Every word she spoke, every breath she let slip, seeped deep into my brain.
The sheet slipped from her hands, leaving her bare—utterly, stunningly bare.
Her skin was pure, unblemished, like freshly fallen snow.
Her delicate, porcelain-like fingers traced over my abs, slid lower past my hip bone, and continued downward without pause.
"What do you want me to do?"
I had no answer.
I wanted her to do anything, and at the same time, I wanted to do something myself.
I
could push her down, or let her push me down.
If I desired it, she would accept every ounce of passion I directed toward her.
To make this intoxicating invitation a reality, I let my fingers trail over the soft curve of her breasts.
I brushed against something, firm and peaked, reminiscent of a dry tongue.
Ah, this is...
...
...
...
Ahem. And now, it's time to announce the results!
Hmm? You’re asking, “What results?”
That was, well… the result of an experiment to see what would happen if I relieved myself while thinking about a certain former archenemy who wouldn’t leave my head.
I mean, everyone’s wondered about that at least once, right? Right?
(…Didn’t really change anything. If anything, I feel even more conflicted…)
That was my answer. It wasn’t exactly a yes, but it wasn’t a no either. More like… a vague sense of guilt. Not that it was impossible to do with Yanagi, but maybe I shouldn’t have?
I mean, I did it just fine. No issues there. Let’s just say it was packed with chocolate all the way to the end.
Of course, the Yanagi in my fantasies was so ridiculously seductive that even the top adult actresses would scoff in disbelief.
But if Yanagi herself ever found out… yeah, I wouldn’t blame her for cutting my head off.
The emptiness afterward—what people call the post-nut clarity—hit way harder than usual.
For the first time in my life, I felt a deep urge to apologize to someone after getting off.
Like, did I just commit a crime or something?
Because in my mind, Yanagi isn’t someone to be defiled.
That smile of hers—I can’t betray it.
Ahh… damn it. Even after all that, I still can’t stop thinking about her.
(If I go by what Gori and the others were saying… does that mean this is love?)
At the very least, I can say for sure that it wasn’t just a passing sexual impulse.
If anything, I’ve been thinking about her in a way that’s completely separate from that.
(I don’t get it… Even though it’s about my own feelings… Ugh, this sucks.)
I decided to avoid concluding that it was love.
My excuse? Insufficient evidence.
And since I had lectures in the morning, but I was feeling way too drained, I shot Kayama a message.
“Can you grab the handouts for me?”
(Might as well go back to sleep. No point thinking about this any further.)
My body was still sore from when I pushed myself too hard helping that girl and Yanagi at the observation deck.
So I figured I’d just take the whole day off and let my body rest.
Before long, my consciousness melted into the embrace of sleep…
──Ding… dong…
“…Nn… huh…?”
At some point, the afternoon light had shifted, and now the setting sun was shining through my window.
Evening already…?
Wait, was that the doorbell just now?
(The door’s unlocked, and Kayama and Gori usually just walk right in. A solicitor…?)
I do the same with Gori’s place sometimes, so it’s a mutual thing.
Still half-asleep, I rubbed my eyes and sluggishly opened the front door.
“Sorry, not interested in religion or sales—”
“It’s neither.”
“AAAHH!!”
I let out a high-pitched yelp like a girl—because there was a girl standing right in front of me.
Flowing silver hair.
Cat-like eyes.
Thin but glossy lips.
For some reason, Yanagi Ritsuka was standing at my doorstep.
“W-Wait, wait, wait… Did I ever tell you my address? Oh, is this a dream? Am I still dreaming?”
“It’s not a dream. I asked Yoshino, and she told me this is where you live.”
“Oh. Uh… Huh. Yeah, except I never gave her my address either…?”
What the hell?
How the hell did my personal info get leaked?
If Yanagi had any hostility or intent to kill me, I’d already be dead at least five times over.
That’s how much I had let my guard down. Completely defenseless. Totally unprepared for this.
But instead of the sword she used to wield, Yanagi was now holding up a plastic bag, showing it to me.
“This.”
“Huh? What is it? Did you forget something…?”
“No, it’s not that. Well, you remember when you got injured before, right? That was… probably my fault. So, I brought some medicine and other things to apologize. Take it.”
“──I can’t accept it. I didn’t get injured. And even if I did, it’s not your fault.”
It wasn’t that I was being stubborn; I was serious when I said it. If it had been four years ago, I wouldn’t have gotten injured from that kind of movement. The truth is, this injury was just because I’d gotten out of shape, and it had nothing to do with Yanagi. So, that’s how it should be.
But Yanagi clearly made a face like she was frustrated. She looked as if she was about to explode with irritation.
“Just by your posture, you’re hurting here, aren’t you!?”
“Ogh!”
Yanagi swung the plastic bag and hit my right side. It didn’t hurt much—if I hadn’t actually injured that spot. But since it was the injured area, I couldn’t help but bend over from the pain.
She really was the “White Mage”. She could tell exactly where I was hurt…
“See? It’s hurting, isn’t it? Now, take this!”
“I-I don’t want to! I’m not hurt!!”
“I don’t want to owe you anything! Take it!”
“I haven’t even borrowed anything from you, so how can I just take it? This is just a hassle!”
“A hassle…? Well then, fine!”
It was probably just a case of words leading to more words. But there were things I didn’t want to give in on either. No matter how mad Yanagi got, I didn’t care. Well, from the look of it, she’d probably just get mad and leave anyway.
“I won’t move from here until you take it!!”
“Huh?”
…I had forgotten. Yanagi’s stubbornness was strong. She was a pretty determined person.
If she were the type to fold under pressure, I wouldn’t be calling her an archenemy in the first place. In a way, that was kind of reassuring.
At the same time, I started to feel self-conscious about the people around us. Since we had been shouting, people from the same floor were peeking out of their doors to see what was going on. It was lucky Gori wasn’t home, but this wasn’t exactly an ideal situation. I quickly lowered my tone.
“Okay, fine, this is starting to get really annoying… Can you just go home already?”
“I’ll leave right after you accept it.”
“…Ugh, damn it! What’s with you? Are you some kind of stickler for obligations or what?”
I grumbled, but Yanagi responded with a slight, proud “Hmph.”
My comment about her being a stickler was meant to be sarcastic, but it seemed she took it as a compliment.
“…Hey. Come inside.”
“Huh?”
“Just come in already!”
I grabbed Yanagi’s hand and forcefully pulled her into the room. Without resisting, she let herself be dragged inside, and I immediately closed the door. I then snatched the plastic bag from her hand.
“W-Wait, uh, well...”
“──I’ll accept this as a gift. It’s the proper etiquette when visiting someone’s home for the first time, right?”
I didn’t want to accept it outright, but if Yanagi wasn’t going to leave unless I took it, I needed some justification for it. That’s when I came up with this idea.
If it was a gift for visiting my room, I could accept it without any issue. That was my reasoning.
“It’s… it’s nothing special, though.”
“No need to worry. I’m actually glad to get this, my side hurts from sleeping awkwardly.”
“That’s… so weird…”
Yanagi remained standing at the entrance. She’d probably already fulfilled her purpose here. I wouldn’t mind if she just turned around and left, but she wasn’t moving. So, without hesitation, I spoke up.
“Come in. I’ll at least offer you some tea.”
“Huh? Well, but… is it really okay?”
“Yeah, it’s fine. Oh, take off your shoes though. This is a Japanese-style house.”
“I know that! You think I’m the type who doesn’t take my shoes off?!”
“You can’t know unless you check the shoes, right?”
“Guess I’ll just check then! I’m coming in!”
Saying that, Yanagi neatly placed her shoes by the entrance. She even arranged my scattered sandals and shoes. She seemed to be the type to notice little details. Sorry about that.
──So, anyway.
““…………””
After I offered her the cold barley tea, we sat in silence.
There wasn’t much in my room. It was almost May, yet I still had my kotatsu blanket out. Other than that, there was a bookshelf, a bed, and my laptop. Yanagi looked around like a cat that had been brought into an unfamiliar place, constantly scanning her surroundings. I could tell her vigilance was at maximum. If I touched anything carelessly, she’d probably attack me with a "Blessing".
(Stop going silent all of a sudden… I have no idea how to start a conversation.)
Yanagi sniffed the tea, then lightly licked the tip of her tongue, likely to confirm that nothing had been added to it. If I were in her shoes, I’d probably do the same... not that I would ever do that!
(Still… having a girl in my room, even if it’s just Yanagi, feels strange.)
Until now, my room had been a self-imposed no-girls zone. No girl had ever come here, so by default, it had been a women-free zone. It felt empty. Not that I had actually forbidden it.
But now, Yanagi was here. And that fact gave me an intense sense of discomfort. It felt like, I don’t know, putting a fancy chandelier in a student apartment—completely out of place.
(After what happened with Yanagi last night, I can’t even look her in the face—no, no, stay calm, stay calm.)
Even so, I couldn’t deny that Yanagi seemed to be sparkling in a way that didn’t feel like a coincidence.
Yes, it was like the ice crystals being illuminated by the setting sun—
“Oi!! Are you seriously about to use your "Blessing" or something!?”
“Huh? Ah, sorry. I just… well, with this, I can be sure no matter what happens.”
“To me, it’s just making me more uneasy!!”
Yanagi didn’t try to hide the fact that she was on alert. When ordinary people get nervous, their bodies tense up or they break into a cold sweat, but for someone with a special ability like a "Marked One", it seemed they ran their fingers over their own powers.
“But you’re probably hiding weapons, right? You give off that kind of vibe.”
“...The gauntlets I used back in the day are still sleeping in the back of the closet. But all my firearms were confiscated when the organization disbanded. If we ended up fighting here, I’d be at a massive disadvantage.”
Gauntlets—the name of them was escaping me, but I had borrowed them as a keepsake. As for the firearms, they were all confiscated, not even a single bullet was left. That was to be expected; I had become an ordinary person now.
“I see. I only got my "Hibari".”
“Hibari? What’s that?”
“It’s my sword.”
“Oh, that sword with the white blade… You’re still keeping it?”
“It’s my beloved blade.”
Yanagi had once wielded a Japanese sword that could cut through anything, combined with her ice "Blessing", and had wreaked havoc. It seemed she could still fight with that same style if she wanted to. It was truly terrifying.
“Also, I still have my uniform. Though I’m not sure if I can still fit into it.”
“Oh, that white-ish one… You should still be able to fit into it.”
“Huh?”
“Eh?”
She glared at me. The ice particles floating around her seemed to gleam even more intensely. Like a shotgun, they seemed ready to shoot toward me at any second. I quickly tried to explain myself.
“No, I mean, you haven’t changed much from four years ago! Your height and everything!!”
“This…! You’re making fun of what I’m sensitive about…!!”
One of the ice shards flew at me, and I quickly dodged by moving my neck. I heard a sharp sound as it shattered against the wall.
It seemed Yanagi was self-conscious about not having grown since then. Back then, she was 14, and now she was 18, so it was clear that there had been no growth during the four years of puberty.
“Wait, wait, wait! I’ve heard that humans keep growing until they’re twenty! You can still grow!!”
“...! Is that so?”
“Yeah. Actually, I have an organization uniform too, but I’ve grown a little since then, so I’m not sure if it’ll fit now. My growth spurt happened after I entered university.”
“Feels like you’re bragging…”
“I’m not! ...Anyway, don’t use your "Blessing" in the room. If you put a hole in the wall, I’ll make you pay for it.”
“Ugh... Fine. I’ll switch to another way of attacking.”
“First of all, stop attacking!!”
If I had any ill intentions, we would have already been in a fight by now. When I told Yanagi that, she made a pouty face and dismissed the premonition of her "Blessing". It seemed like the mention of "compensation" had worked.
However, it looked like Yanagi's tension had finally eased. She pointed at the bookshelf.
“There are a lot of manga. You can read them?”
“Yeah. Almost half of them aren’t mine, though, they belong to a friend.”
“No, I meant the words.”
“Are you saying, 'You can read words'!? Am I a monkey or something!?”
How low does she think of me? Well, it’s probably on purpose… Yanagi chuckled quietly.
She then proceeded to browse the bookshelf, crawling on all fours, with her back to me.
(Don’t suddenly act defenseless…)
Wasn’t there a sharp contrast between her state of caution and her lack of it now? Yanagi's backside… Ugh, what the hell is this? Even through her clothes, why can I make out the curves so clearly? Wait, no, no, was her backside this alluring?
This is bad, I really don’t want her to sway around like that in my line of sight. The guilt is fading, and tonight, something else will change, and it will find its way into my dominant hand. I can’t, I can’t, I can’t… Stay calm, stay calm.
“I know this one. It’s the manga my older brother likes. He says 'Bora-bora', right?”
“Yeah, but why specifically that one...?”
Isn’t it supposed to be 'O' instead of 'Bo'? Just like with Mahjong, it seems most of Yanagi’s half-baked knowledge came from her older brother—whoever that is.
“I know this one too. The macho protagonist spits paint out of his mouth, right?”
“The original Kenshiro isn’t that weak!!”
That’s the way it’s portrayed in pachinko or pachislot. It’s obvious that Yanagi’s older brother has been bad-mouthing it on purpose.
“I’ve only got famous series on the shelves, though. Don’t you read manga?”
“I do. But I don’t really go for these kinds of ones for guys. Oh, but I read all of those. The art’s weird, everyone’s got these really sharp chins…”
“Oh, that one. It’s interesting, right?”
“Yeah. The protagonist guy is really strong-willed, he’s like ‘I won’t lose to anyone!’ He’s got this invincible vibe…”
“Ah, so you mean the series with the guy from the divine realm playing Mahjong?”
“‘The Dog’s Room’ was really scary.”
“‘The Wretched’!!”
That’s actually a pretty obscure series. I’m surprised you knew about it.
From what I can tell, Yanagi seems to read a lot of shoujo manga. I’m not familiar with that genre, so we didn’t have any common ground. However, she did mention a few titles, so maybe I’ll try reading them sometime. But it’d be too embarrassing to buy them myself, so maybe I’ll get someone like Kouyame to pick them up for me…
“…Hey. What exactly is Yoshino-san?”
“Hm… Are you interested in Yoshino?”
Although the atmosphere had relaxed a bit, as soon as I brought up Yoshino-san, Yanagi’s expression turned sharp again. She seemed to become more intense when it involved other people.
"There is. Because I haven’t told either you or Yoshino-san my address."
"Ah, now that you mention it, you did say that. Hmm, didn’t you tell her, though?"
"I never had the chance to. I haven’t seen her since that group date."
So, my interest in my girlfriend stems from a sense of caution.
Yanagi seemed to pick up on that, murmuring, "I see."
"She's just a normal girl, though… Oh, you're thinking about Yoshino’s "Blessing" right now, aren’t you?"
"Well… I guess. The only thing that stands out as a possibility for her to gather my personal information is that."
"It’s not that kind of "Blessing". I can firmly say that."
Then, what kind of "Blessing" is it? Even if I asked, she wouldn’t answer. Those with abnormal abilities, or "Marked Ones," rarely reveal the details of their "Blessing", even to members of the same organization, unless they trust them greatly.
And when it comes to a close friend’s "Blessing", there’s zero chance that Yanagi would speak about it.
"…I wonder. If it’s a "Blessing" that can be applied in many ways, I might not know."
"I told you it’s not that. But… it might have something to do with Yoshino’s part-time job."
"She works part-time? Huh, is it at a restaurant or something?"
If I had unknowingly gone to her part-time job and somehow extracted her personal information, it wouldn’t be surprising if I knew where she lived. It’s not the most pleasant thought.
However, to my assumption of it being a restaurant, Yanagi shook her head vigorously.
"No. She works as an office clerk at a detective agency."
"Then that’s the answer!!"
That’s a job that deals with personal information all the time. All the mysteries just clicked into place.
"But she’s just an office clerk. She doesn’t tell me what the work actually involves... Shuu... doesn't tell me either."
"Sounds like a mix of trade secrets and confidentiality. Well, if it’s a detective agency, it wouldn’t be odd for them to know my personal info—... Wait, no."
I’ve never used a detective agency. That means it’s more likely I’ve been investigated.
Who? When? And for what purpose? What were they trying to find out about me?
I placed my hand over my mouth, sinking deep into my thoughts.
I hate being investigated. I have more pasts that shouldn’t be known than most people.
If someone were to dig up those old wounds without my permission—then that person would only be my enemy.
"Sorry. You're doubting Yoshino, aren’t you? But she’s not..."
"She’s an office clerk, right? Not a ‘client.’ My enemy is that ‘client,’ but—"
The air thickened. If I were to doubt Yoshino-san and press her on it… it’s likely that Yanagi would step in front of me to protect her, and at that point, a confrontation would be inevitable.
"—It’s highly probable she’s involved. I want to talk to her."
"…Do you think she’ll give you permission?"
"You’re not the one who makes that decision. I am."
The one who initiated the investigation was them, and even though I am the victim in this case, those kinds of interests are irrelevant. Yanagi would protect what she values more. Now—would it be possible to neutralize Yanagi without weapons?
Not a single movement. If either of us made a move, it would signal the start of a confrontation. We stared at each other with the eyes of former "enemies," not as mere university students.
——Click.
"As usual, you never lock your door, Saigawa. I brought the lecture handouts! Boobs!!"
Bam! Suddenly, Kuyama appeared. The moment he saw Yanagi, he leapt up and slammed his back into the ceiling, then dropped onto his stomach with a thud, sounding like a squashed frog as he groaned.
Could you stop moving like a supernatural being?
"W-w-w-why is there a woman in this man’s domain!?"
"Don’t call it a man’s domain! And why? Well...?"
"U-um, yeah, that’s right. This person, he’s the one who went wild at the group date, right?"
Our fighting spirit immediately deflated. Kuyama looked at Yanagi with fearful eyes, while Yanagi observed him as though looking at a rare animal at a zoo.
"Y-you were the one who went wild at the group date too... I remember that silver hair... Ah, my name’s Kuyama. I don’t want to say ‘nice to meet you,’ though… Please go home from my house…!"
"It’s my house, idiot."
"Nice to meet you. I’m Yanagi. I’m, well, what am I to Saigawa-kun?"
When asked again, I couldn’t come up with an answer. I wasn’t really a friend or senior to Yanagi.
While Yanagi was looking for an answer, once again, the door to the house opened by itself.
"Saigawa~. I got some sake from my parents~. Let’s have a drink—Ahhh?"
"Eeek! A red chicken!"
It was Gori-san, and upon seeing Gori-san, Yanagi screamed. Gori-san had a tough appearance, so it was understandable that she was scared at first sight. But a red chicken...?
"What’s this, huh? If you’re bringing a woman in, you should’ve said so~. Guess I’ll read the air and leave~"
"It’s not like that, Gori-san. She’s not my girlfriend or anything. Ah, Yanagi. This person is my neighbor and a senior, Morino-senpai. We call him Gori-san."
"Chick… I’m Yanagi, human, forgive me."
"It’s Gori~. Well, my real name’s Gori, but yeah~. I can tell you’re human just by looking at you."
"How should I know? Women, once you peel off their layers... Ugh! I don’t want to peel off layers! Scary!!"
"So, Kuyama’s fallen to pieces, huh? This is one hell of a situation, Saigawa~?"
"I wouldn’t say that, though..."
Of all the times for Yanagi, Kuyama, and Gori-san to all gather, it had to be now. I’d explain our relationships to them later, but Yanagi was scared of Gori-san, so it’d probably be best to get her to leave quickly.
"Yanagi. It’s about time you head home—"
"Wait, Saigawa~. You said her name’s Yanagi, right? Hold on a second, I’ve got some good stuff for you~"
"Good stuff... big stuff..."
"What the hell are you talking about, Yanagi...?"
Gori-san placed the gift of sake on the table and left the room.
It seemed like he went back to his room to grab something, and within a minute, he returned.
In his hands was a tray filled with an assortment of colorful cupcakes!
"I'm not saying you have to leave, but since we're here, you should eat up!"
"Wow, amazing... Did you make these, Gori-san?"
"Yeah."
"Dammit, those cupcakes were supposed to be for us...!"
"It’s fine, don’t worry about it."
Despite his appearance—and I mean no disrespect—Gori-san had a hobby of baking sweets, aside from illegally modifying toy guns. He seemed to enjoy tasks that involved using his hands. The taste of his creations was well-known, and both Kuyama and I had often been treated to them. Yanagi, who had been scared at first, was now staring in awe with sparkling eyes.
"Saigawa~. Should I boil some water? I’ll make tea for Yanagi~."
"Ah, sure. And could you make enough for everyone?"
"Leave it to me~."
And so, for some reason, the four of us ended up having a tea time together…
＊
"It's delicious...! Gori-san, this is delicious! Yes, it is!"
"Ohh~. Where exactly does it taste good? Tell me, Yanagi~."
"Uh, condensed milk! It's used, in the batter."
"Hya-hahahahaha!!"
Gori-san suddenly burst out laughing, causing Yanagi to jump in surprise.
Condensed milk in the batter... Is that so? Kuyama and I don't bake, so we don’t know much about specific ingredients like that. All we can say to Gori-san is that it’s delicious.
"Yanagi~...♡"
"!? "
"That’s a pretty high level, Gori-san..."
Throwing kisses was one of Gori-san’s signature moves. Whenever he was in a good mood or got something right, he would show us this. Needless to say, it wasn’t something we were particularly thrilled about.
As expected, Yanagi had no idea what was going on and stared at me, silently asking for an explanation.
"Well, you were right about the condensed milk. That was the signal."
"Is that so... I've never seen anyone do something like that..."
"That’s normal, so don’t worry."
"Being forced to reveal a secret isn’t exactly fun, but... I guess I wouldn’t mind if it was a secret ingredient."
"But I thought Gori-senpai used condensed milk too."
"Tch."
Gori-san clicked his tongue loudly in response to Kuyama. This tongue click was the complete opposite of the throwing kiss. It seemed that Kuyama hadn’t earned any points in Gori-san’s book.
"There’s more, so go ahead and eat as much as you want, Yanagi. There's chocolate flavor too~."
"Yay! Thanks!"
(Gori-san really likes Yanagi, huh...)
It seemed like Yanagi had been completely won over by the cupcakes, as her fear and wariness of Gori-san had almost disappeared. She had mentioned having an older brother, so maybe Yanagi preferred older men, considering the age gap. I’m not that much older than him... What am I thinking?
"—Heh. So, you properly snagged a girl at that group date, huh, Saigawa~?"
"You're pretty sharp. I thought you left me behind and went home early that day."
"No, it’s not like I snagged anyone. And you leaving and going home was your fault."
After that, we were mostly asked about my relationship with Yanagi. It was strange for me, someone who had never shown interest in girls before, to suddenly bring one into my room. Both of them seemed curious about the situation.
"Me and Saigawa-kun are, um... old acquaintances? I guess?"
"Is it from high school or middle school? A junior, maybe?"
"Not really. Well... more like an extension of a hobby, I guess."
"Hobby? Saigawa? That’s a first for me. So, Yanagi-chan is a gun enthusiast too?"
"I’m into swords, I can’t really handle guns."
"Whoa!! Don’t suddenly start talking!!"
"Why are you reacting like that after asking the question? That’s way too extreme..."
We had once fought, exchanging blades and bullets day and night, but we keep that hidden from the outside world. Even if we told someone, they wouldn’t believe us, and it would probably just come across as strange. So, we can only leave it vague, but it’s clear that we haven’t earned Gori-san or Kuyama’s understanding.
...By the way, Yanagi, you're saying some pretty risky stuff.
"Reuniting with an acquaintance at a group date, huh? That’s pretty dramatic. Yanagi~. Saigawa may look like this, but he’s not a bad guy. I think he’s a good catch, for the authorities."
"It’s a bit weird being called ‘authorities’ by Gori-san."
"Saigawa-kun is... um, what’s ‘tokyoku’?"
Yanagi was about to comment on my evaluation but stopped.
Instead, he raised a different question, wondering about Gori-san’s peculiar way of referring to himself.
"Gori-senpai also dabbles in amateur radio. That’s why he calls himself 'the authorities.'"
"Amateur radio...?"
"Whoa! Don’t ask suddenly!!"
"Are you okay? Seriously."
Kuyama clung to me. When it comes to women, Kuyama doesn’t even manage to hold a conversation properly; it’s more like he hits and runs the conversation. Of course, he’s the one running away. What a mess.
"Ahhh!!! Scaryyyy!!!"
While headbanging, Kuyama was making it clear he was terrified of women. Yanagi, having seen this bizarre behavior at the group date, still hadn’t reached the point of completely backing off.
"...Weird person. Why do you do that? Is it some kind of 'cost' or something?"
"Of course not. It’s just that Kuyama has a fear of women. So, basically, you're scary."
I said it so casually, but the "cost" refers to the price paid when using a "blessing." A "blessing" is not something you can use without risk. Each person with a "mark" has a specific "cost" they must pay. But, explaining all this, it’s clear that Yanagi is the type to talk about this kind of underworld stuff without a second thought, while Kuyama has no connection to it at all and is just clueless.
"Really? I’m scared of ghosts, too."
But Yanagi, completely unfazed, shared what he was scared of after hearing about phobias.
"Saigawa~. Yanagi is a good kid, isn’t she?"
"Well, Yanagi’s kind of weird too."
"I’m not weird! And Saigawa-kun, you’re the weird one!"
"That’s right! Saigawa is... weird! Can I play that recording...?"
"Hey, if you play that, I’ll kill you."
Why am I the one getting blamed here? I’m not one to brag, but out of the four of us, I’m clearly the most normal. If we took a street survey, I’d win for sure.
"This is a pretty good vibe, huh? Hey, you guys, how about we play a 'game'...?"
It was already sunset, but suddenly Gori-san said something like that. When someone with his face says "game," the only thing that comes to mind is some shady gambling activity. In fact, Yanagi swallowed nervously.
"'Game'... huh. Well, I don't have anything like that."
"Don't worry. What we're betting isn't money~. It's your 'life'!!"
"You're betting something bigger than money!?"
"Gambling is bad! That's what it is!"
"Your life, huh. If I bet my life, I doubt there'd be much return."
Each of us said something, but Gori-san just chuckled with a 'kukukuku.' He suddenly started acting like a death game host... What on earth is he thinking?
At that point, Gori-san went back to the room and came back with—
"'Life Sugoroku'~...!!"
"That's..."
If you don’t like it, just say so. Why did you make it sound so grand?
"Nostalgic! We used to play this a lot with Yoshino and the others. I didn’t know you had something like this, Gori-san!"
"Why the sudden change? We don’t usually play this kind of thing."
"Well, it’s boring if just the three of us in the authorities play it~. But with four, that’s a different story~."
"Returning to childhood—it's a privilege of university students. Yanagi-chan, it's already the last train, so you should head home."
"No, I can still make it."
"Don’t try to casually send Yanagi home!!"
If Yanagi leaves, we’d be short on numbers. Though, the part about returning to childhood is probably true.
University students often return to childhood after a while. Things we stopped doing in middle or high school—like tag or dodgeball—sometimes get done again. Though, I’ve only ever seen such events on campus from the sidelines...
Anyway, we decided to enjoy 'Life Sugoroku' as a group of four.
"Oh, there's a fork in the road. Uh, the job route and the part-time route. I guess I’ll have to start job hunting this year. I’m getting kind of depressed just thinking about it..."
"Don’t worry, Saigawa~. If you mess up job hunting, you can just repeat the year~."
"Gori-san’s job hunting mistakes are because you keep taking public servant exams with that look...”
"Gori-san, you’re doing that? I think a pastry shop might suit you better."
Even if he passes the written exam, Gori-san doesn’t stop his red mohawk style for job hunting, so he keeps getting rejected in the public servant exam interviews. "Look in the mirror," Kuyama and I have advised him, but it has no effect.
Now, as for my job hunting (in the game), I ended up as a 'salaryman.'
You don't choose your profession; you take whatever job corresponds to the space you land on.
"Haha. Playing it safe, huh, Saigawa."
"There's no dream in this, Saigawa-kun, even though it’s just a game."
"I-I can’t help it. Blame my dice roll luck."
One by one, the jobs were decided. Kuyama got 'racer,' and Gori-san got 'programmer.'
"I got... yes! 'Idol'! This is strong, right?"
"'Idol'... huh. Yanagi is..."
I imagined Yanagi dancing on stage, wearing a frilly outfit and being bathed in the spotlight, and I simply thought, not bad at all... Her hair color is nice too.
"Yanagi-chan would suit being an idol, don't you think? Heh..."
"You’re making it sound like you’re about to puke. I hate you, Kuyama-senpai..."
By the way, Kuyama’s racer job has the highest income in the game, though it comes with a lot of bad events. Yanagi’s idol job has a large income fluctuation, but also plenty of good events. As for Gori-san and my jobs, they’re stable, but we get very few events.
In this game, the winner is the one who has the most money by the end. It’s not about reaching the goal space; the key is how much you can earn along the way.
"Oh. I landed on the 'Revenge' space."
—Naturally, some spaces allow you to attack other players.
Right now, Yanagi had landed on the 'Revenge' space. She could choose another player and force them to pay a fine or make them move backward. Yanagi... grinned mischievously.
"Heh heh heh. Who should I target, I wonder?"
She pointed her finger at each of us one by one as she made her decision.
Me, Gori-san, Kuyama, me, Gori-san, Kuyama, me, me, me, me, me...
"Just kill me already!!"
"If Saigawa-kun begs for his life, maybe I'll let you off, though~?"
"There's no way I’m begging. It’s not a problem if I take this little attack."
"Heh, is that so? Well then, Kuyama-senpai gets the fine."
"Aaaahhh!!!"
By sheer coincidence, Kuyama got hit. With the fact that he was chosen by Yanagi, Kuyama writhed in agony, flopping around. Gori-san, seeing this, laughed so hard that he clutched his stomach.
"...It’s not me, huh?"
"Yeah. Because you’re a 'salaryman,' Saigawa-kun. 'Racer' is stronger."
"You bastard..."
Surprisingly, Yanagi was playing this quite calmly. She must have judged that Kuyama’s racer job, which was strong, was the biggest threat. Since we were playing as four, this didn’t count as a direct competition between me and Yanagi, but losing to her still stung. At the very least, I wanted to place higher than her...!
"Oh. I landed on the wedding space. You guys owe me wedding gifts, wedding gifts! Hand them over!!"
Next, I landed on the wedding space. Upon landing, I could take money as wedding gifts from all the other players, so in a broad sense, this could be considered an attack space. Though, it’s a bit of a stretch to call marriage an attack.
Now, in this game, each player uses a car-shaped token with a pin representing themselves. The color of the car corresponds to the pin color. For me, it’s a black car with a black pin. Yanagi uses white, Kuyama uses red, and Gori-san uses blue. If you get married, you add a partner pin to your car.
...For some reason, Gori-san decided to stick my car with Yanagi’s white partner pin.
"Ahh! Gori-san, that’s mine! Don’t put it on without asking! Ugh!"
"Why are you putting Yanagi’s pin on my car?"
"Don’t worry about it~. If we all get married, I’ll stick your pin on Saigawa’s car too~. Muah♡"
"Please use your own pin..."
"Well then, when I get married, I think I’ll stick your pin on Saigawa’s car."
"Ugh... In that case, when I get married, I’ll put Saigawa-kun’s pin on mine..."
"Hey, stop it! We’re running out of pins!"
Stop fighting over me. Actually, no, wait. Whatever, stop fighting over me!
And from then on—
"I landed on the 'Revenge' space! Saigawa, get the money ready~"
"Ugh..."
"I also landed on 'Revenge.' Saigawa—how about a condolence gift?"
"We’re not having a funeral!! Damn it!!"
"I landed on 'Revenge' too! Kuyama-senpai, you’re next!"
Gagagaga
—Kuyama swore to remain single for life, Gori-san repeatedly landed on the childbirth space and had a huge family, Yanagi became a huge success as an idol and amassed great wealth, while I was constantly the one being taken advantage of, and the game proceeded with a lot of excitement and laughter.
In the end, the winner was... well, let’s just say it wasn’t me.
"Mmm, that was fun~!"
"Yeah, I bet."
By now, it was late, and I was walking Yanagi to the nearest station. She insisted she could go home by herself, but Gori-san strongly told me to see her off, so she reluctantly accepted.
However, Yanagi was actually in a good mood. Stretching and walking cheerfully.
"Gori-san, you’re such a good person! You treated me to pizza! Kuyama-senpai is... well..."
"Yeah, I get it. He's like that. If he bothered you, I’m sorry."
"Mmm, it’s not that. It’s just that person..."
It seems that Yanagi was checking my expression. Kuyama, at least in terms of appearance, easily outshines me and Gori-san. If Yanagi is interested in Kuyama—ah, that would be really annoying, somehow.
"...Well, whatever. More importantly, Saigawa-kun."
"What’s up?"
"Here. I’m calling Yoshino right now. You can talk to her. You’re curious, right?"
"Huh? Out of the blue…!?"
Yanagi handed me her smartphone. On the screen was Yoshino, and she was currently dialing a call. Indeed, there were things I wanted to ask Yoshino, but...
"Hello? What’s up? Are you calling to let me know you're staying at Saigawa-san's place?"
"...No, that’s not it. Ah, long time no see. It’s Saigawa speaking."
"Whoa, Saigawa-san? Did something happen with that kid?!"
"No, it’s not that—"
I got straight to the point and asked Yoshino, "How did you know my address?"
I also asked about her work at the detective agency.
"Ah, that. The information I learn through my job is strictly for work use only, but the reason I looked up where you live, Saigawa-san, was because of my Blessing. That’s how I can use it."
"...So it’s really the Blessing."
It must be some kind of detection ability. Considering her actions, I could narrow down its nature, but it’s definitely not combat-related, so there’s no need to probe further.
"Eh!? Really!?"
"Ritsuka’s surprised?! By the way, about the detective agency, there’s actually a request related to you, Saigawa-san. I can talk about that much, but after that, I can't say more. It's not something dangerous, though. So, don’t worry, but... maybe that’s a weird thing to say..."
"That’s enough for me. Thanks for telling me. It really helped."
"No problem... Oh, and it seems like Ritsuka’s caused you some trouble."
"Hey! I think it’s time to hang up now! We’re out of time!"
"Well, you did enjoy yourself, didn’t you?"
"Looks like it. I can tell by your voice. Oh, and by the way, that kid has been talking about you nonstop to me lately—"
At that point, Yanagi forcibly snatched the phone from my hands, said, "I’m heading home now!" to Yoshino, and abruptly ended the call. In the moonlight, I could tell her face was red.
"W-wait! I was just—! Complaining about you! To Yoshino, I was just—!"
"Seriously, what a disaster you are."
I don’t mind whatever they say, really. If someone talks about me enough to have an impression of me... well, that’s actually kind of nice. Unless everything was a complaint, of course.
For a while, we walked in silence. Eventually, the station's rotary came into view.
"...Today was fun. Really. It’s been a while since I had fun like that. It reminded me of when I was in the Organization. Back then, there were only older people around... um, so, yeah."
"──Hey, Yanagi."
"What?"
I hadn’t planned on saying that. It just slipped out naturally.
"Come again sometime. Even if you don’t have anything to do. Maybe we could invite Gori-san, Kuyama, and even Yoshino-san. You know, we could all hang out again... I had fun, too."
So, this was my true feeling. But beneath that truth, there was another truth.
I just wanted to meet Yanagi again, without any excuses. That’s what I thought.
"........."
Yanagi was looking at me as if piercing through me. I didn’t really want to think about what kind of response I would get.
"Y-You’re okay with just being with everyone, right?"
"Huh?"
"A-Actually, no... I mean! We still haven’t finished what we started, right!? If we’re all together, we can’t settle things, right!? I just thought... Is that really okay? That’s all I meant! Just that!"
My heart raced. I wanted to meet her without excuses. But if that wasn’t possible, then I’d need an excuse. If that’s how Yanagi felt, then I should follow her lead.
"Ah... Yeah, that’s true. I guess so. But aside from that, I’ll still call you out personally to settle things. And when I do—don’t run away."
"I won’t run away. But you better not cry after losing, okay? Like you did earlier!"
"I didn’t cry!"
We reached the ticket gate. Yanagi got ready to pass through.
"Be careful on your way home. Well, for you, you’ll probably be fine, though."
"Yeah. Oh, by the way..."
Yanagi passed through the ticket gate and turned back to face me.
"Make sure you properly heal your injury. It’s a promise with Ritsuka-chan, okay? Kiss♡"
"Why are you copying that...?"
The train arrived just in time. Yanagi waved at me and ran off. It was good timing with the train arriving.
If I looked at my face in a mirror now, I’d probably be as red as if I’d been drinking.
Gori-san’s influence on Yanagi was surprisingly big, and for the first time, I was thankful for that man’s frankly annoying habit. When a girl does it to you, it feels surprisingly nice.
So, I wanted to thank Yanagi for teaching me that.
(...Maybe I’ll buy a beer on the way home as thanks. Haha, the night sky is beautiful.)
I never used to think much about the night sky. But whether I found it beautiful or not seemed to depend more on my mood than I expected.
The relationship between Yanagi and me was slowly, steadily changing.
Not an enemy, not a junior, not a friend. Something else entirely, something I longed for.
Once the feelings inside me took a clear shape, I couldn’t deceive myself anymore.
––Saigawa Rouji had fallen in love with Yanagi Ritsuka.
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